Perverted Poems from Nick's Show on Virgin


Typed up by Dean Bridges.

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When you're chatting up, try to be subtle.
Take it slowly, let her set the pace.
A light touch on the arm will demonstrate charm,
on the tits gets a slap in the face!

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Intelligent and witty, she'll be fickle to the end.
She'll gaze in your eyes and tell you sweet lies
while your other hand's groping your friend.

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Eye contact is very important,
make sure that your gaze never flickers.
A confident stare lets you know that you're there
and you want to go inside her knickers.

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No, I can't make it this evening because I'm going to fall off my bike.
I'm going to ride straight at some railings and end up empaled on a spike.
Yes, I agree it sounds painful and instead I could go out with you.
It's a choice between death and your rotten breath so pass me my cycle clips do.

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Our eyes met across the dance floor, I gave her my sexy smile.
I kept this up almost a hour to let her sweat a while.
At last I went over and said "Hi, my name's Keith."
She said "Really, did you know you've got cabbage in your teeth."


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